Step One: Tell Her You Love Her
By telling the already vulnerable woman these three little words you have put a crack in her shell. This provides a small amount of comfort and trust, as the myth goes if a man tells you he loves you it must be true. Because of past incidents some women don’t believe they deserve the love and will be drawn to the idea of being genuinely loved. Love is a powerful weapon whether it is real or not and the idea of fantastical love can always be used as a lure. Once the woman believes you, almost anything is possible. The list of things women will give for love is endless and that is fact.
Step Two: Show Investment
After gaining the opening to trust it’s time to make her feel she is worth you. Your time, small gestures, and constant loving contact will cloud her mind and her guard starts to lower. Take this time to hit hard and make her believe she will always be your first priority and always be worth your time and kind words. The comfort and the illusion of safety you provide will make her think she has finally found someone who knows her true worth. Don’t underestimate the power of a man’s chest underneath a well stroked woman’s head. Maintaining a small inexpensive date night once a month or more solidifies the trust and the illusion of worth, opening the doors to her heart.
Step Three: Show Her She’s Beautiful
For the first six months to a year tell the woman that she is beautiful every chance you get. Get lovingly lost in her eyes, touch the small of her back when you hold open a door, smile at her too much, and always make her blush. This is the first of many nails in her coffin. Now you can’t do any wrong. Now you are the piece that is filling the void in her heart and mind that others created. Stick with the weakness you are instilling in her and use it to keep her for the amount of time needed. Most women need validation of their beauty, hence the women you see showing as much as they can while claiming to be a lady.
Step Four: Show Her you Want Her All the Time
Once she believes she is beautiful in your eyes move on to showing her you can’t keep your hands off of her. Even if it’s just sexual the woman will think it is a sign of true love and not just lust. Lust is also a formidable weapon if used right. Lust can be confused with love and true wanting. Sex is a means to an end. The orgasm is the goal not necessarily the intimacy. Intimacy is what a woman thrives on. It proves that she is still in the relationship she thinks she’s in. Illusions are a key way to keep your vacationship going. Stay around her and at her house. Show her you have no intentions on leaving her side and the mere thought of her drives you crazy. If you are advanced enough you can pull off the emotionless fake intimacy D-bomb and cuddle. Keep her warm at night and actually train yourself to hold her while you sleep. Feeling wanted is a euphoric and mind bending feeling. It will make her more open, dependent, trusting, and eager to please. Trust is a way to a woman’s heart.
Step Five: Silently Ask for Devotion and Attention
This is where it starts to change. Become a little reclusive, held back, and don’t interact as much. This will cause the woman to think she has done something wrong or hasn’t fulfilled a need of yours. If you’ve been doing everything right up until this point the transition should be easy. Of course the questions will come. Stay smooth and calm. Remember you created and control the fantasy she’s in. Keep her thinking it will pass, this way she will continue to hold on. Make her believe that if she just stays by your side and gives you all her attention that you’ll be fine. Women are fixers by nature. No you can’t change or fix a man but you can make a woman believe she can.
Step Six: Back Off
This is the lull stage. Become more of a sit in boyfriend and let her get comfortable with you being in her personal space but not really with her. She is now invested and devoted to the want and need to make you happy and hopefully not push you farther into your newly created hole. Now the chill can begin. Half conversations about nothing and the ability to be alone next to someone just in case needs arise. By this time the dates should have lessened or ceased completely with an excuse in regards to transportation, funds, family, or lack of interest in activities offered. This won’t always go over well but the love and trust should keep her coming back. Intimacy will of course be lacking by this point but the occasional snuggle and warm body will quail her needs. Make her believe you just need more space and freedom. Make her a very mild burden. Hurt women are easier to control.
Step Seven: Become Complacent and Ask for More
Now this is an art. Make it known that you are at a point where you don’t want to do anything in regards to going out or being extremely close all the time without ever saying. Become completely comfortable just existing. Once that is established ask for an upgrade from her. Her hair is never done, she never gets dressed anymore, and she just isn’t trying as hard. You did this to her by making her feel she wasn’t worth taking out anymore or being treated beautiful. Good job. Now ask her to be beautiful again, make her feel you deserve it and that maybe it will upgrade the relationship as well. Small things should suffice as you don’t want her to resent you, just to want you to want her again.
Step Eight: Make Her as Complacent as You
Going from complacent to comfortable to give her hope is another way to keep her in the fantasy. Show her briefly that you are still in this with her. Show up and actually talk, enjoy her friends, smile at her, and make her feel you still love her. Play this card for a while but never change what you do when the two of you are alone. This will make her think you want to be around her, you enjoy her but you’re just a laid back guy. There’s nothing really wrong in the relationship you just like the down time and being in her aura. Now she feels a little better. The questions about going out and why you aren’t close will cease for a short period and she will cling to the idea that she is still worth your time and she should try to let you be yourself.
Step Nine: Take Advantage and See How Far She’ll Bend
Even knowing about her financial, emotional, or physical situations, push the boundaries. Use her money even though you work and she doesn’t. Use her link or eat her food but don’t contribute to the fridge. Don’t support her emotionally when you know she needs it even though you could. Keep your finances and real plans secret and see how much of herself she is willing to give in return for minimal support. Always remember what you spend and remember to make her feel guilty for every penny and every minute of your time, this way she feels she may owe you something.
Step Ten: Make her Question Herself
Now while she is trying to make up for lost time or finances continue to pull away slowly. Don’t hang around her as much, don’t contact her as much, and cut down spending the night as much as possible. When she asks you to stay come up with any lame excuse because at this point she will take whatever she can get out of you. If you were only looking for a hideaway from life, by this time you have other women you are talking to or maybe even sleeping with. This will make leaving much easier for you. Or you’ve saved enough to move on to your own space and don’t need the woman’s as much.
Step Eleven: Stay but don’t be Present and Play the Victim
When she asks you to come over or pulls a sex card, go. These are the times that will keep her holding on and waiting on you. At this point she is hoping that you will see her worth again or at least make her feel you are still there and want her. If she begins to become tired or aware and you want the vacationship to last longer make a small grand gesture. When she finally calls you out or ignores you it’s time to turn the tables. Show up at her house and force her to talk. Tell her you messed up even if you have no intentions of changing yourself or the dynamic that has been created. Make sure she believes you want to be there for no other reason but her and that you are so hurt you made her feel lesser or have been mean. Make her believe that it broke your heart when she ignored you. Tell her how hectic your life is, and how she doesn’t understand. Be nice for a couple of days making her comfortable again and then leave. The woman will not be able to decipher between your ploys and your real at this point so she will just hope for real. Do not let her realize it was a show. If you need more time and want to stretch it out you must play this card very carefully. Pay attention to the signs of trust and meter if they are waning. This could mean the real end is near and your other options may be seeing more of you.
Step Twelve: Enjoy the Spoils
By this point either the vacationship will dissipate on its own or there will be a point when you must end things. Of course things like Valentine’s Day, anniversaries, or any random special occasion outings or gifts have ceased so there shouldn’t be anything expected when holidays come. That string has already been cut. Now for the emotional part. If you are trying to create a side, you’ve already destroyed that and not a lot of men can balance the two women, especially if they couldn’t balance one. If you’re good enough maybe you can keep a buddy by separating “mutually” because the timing is wrong or you want to focus on a new career or you’re better as friends. Each one of these excuses needs finesse to pull off peacefully and still be able to pop by for a quick one. Now if you just want to be done. Tell her without telling her. Ignore her, be aloof, be mean, and be frustrated all the time. If this has been your plan all along you have already established a good base of lies and examples to friends and family to make you the victim and her the villain. You have also not claimed the woman publicly or given her much time around old friends or family. To everyone else it will seem as if the end was obvious and she was oblivious. Now with all that done, sit back and enjoy yourself while it lasts.